Monday, March 29, 2010

Day 155: Psychic Reading

"My mom has a book, Linda Goodman's Sun Signs, that was written in the seventies, and despite using anecdotes that are somewhat outdated, it nails details about my Libra personality almost exactly. Through the years, we've enjoyed reading about my family members, friends and guys that I've dated, trying to decode their quirks based on their astrological sign.

I'm not foolish enough to live and die, or even make decisions based on what my horoscope says, and I don't take any of it very seriously. But I do believe in astrology and I believe who we are is somewhat rooted by our sun signs.

So with an already developed interest, on Day 155, I went to a psychic as the thing I've never done before.

I sought the advice of my friend Natalie, who now lives in Los Angeles, but has visited a couple of psychics in Atlanta. She was eager to help.

Natalie explained that she has been to two different psychics, both women who work out of their homes in Cumming, Georgia, a city about 40 miles north of Atlanta. For those of you familiar with the Atlanta area, you may be as baffled by the fact that there are any psychics living in Cumming. Well, there are. There are at least two.

The other part of our conversation that struck me was that Natalie went to see the psychic with her mom. My mom's idea of bonding with me is getting pedicures or discount shopping at Steinmart. I think Natalie and her mom are on to something.

Natalie explained to me the difference between the psychics. One woman named Denise charges $160 dollars an hour. She "hears angels" (Say wha?) and reads Tarot cards. Denise is from New York and is very opinionated.

Rose is an older lady who reads palms and Tarot cards. Her reading gave more concrete times for things, which Natalie liked. But, she confessed, "nothing that she said is going to happen has happened yet." Rose's readings are $20 for half an hour.

Twenty dollars to unlock all of the exciting news about me and what my life has in store? Rose it is.

Natalie and I went back and forth on email for a while, and she told me that if I'm seeking true guidance, I should probably seek a therapist, which I completely agree with. But she also said "Grandma" Rose had given her a lot of really good news about the next year, so she preferred her to Denise.

I like the idea of picking a doctor this way as well. Go to several, and pick the one that gives you the best news. I called Rose's husband and made arrangements to meet with her on Day 155.

I shared my plans with several people from work, telling them that I had just made an appointment to get a psychic reading. My friend Justin emailed back immediately.

"Why the appointment? Didn't she know you were coming?"

"No smart ass," I replied, "Rose doesn't make her own appointments. Her husband makes them for her."

My friend Kyle was supportive, telling me that she went to see a psychic, as a joke, right after we had first graduated from college.

She said she didn't really take it seriously, but she said, "I remember her telling me that I was going to marry someone I was already friends with."

At the time, that idea seemed far-fetched, and sent Kyle and our other friend Trish into a frenzy thinking about which one of our friends it could be. Turns out, Kyle's psychic was right, and she did marry her very best friend Greg years later.

I'm not even sure I believe in psychics, but I started to get excited about this experience and what Grandma Rose might tell me.

I left my house an hour before the appointment for the long ride to the suburbs of Cumming, Georgia. My directions led me to a normal looking house in a normal looking neighborhood. Part of me worried that Rose's house might be the one trailer in the woods off a dirt road, but I suspected Natalie would've shared that ahead of time. Rose's house looked like a house in the neighborhood I grew up in.

I wondered, looking at the relatively normal surroundings, if Rose's neighbors knew what she did for a living Did the revolving door of guests looking for guidance confuse them? Maybe she gives them free readings?

I walked to the front door and rang the doorbell. I could see through the glass door that there was a cat hotel set up in the rear of the living room and tons of crafts hanging on the walls.

Rose's husband greeted me wearing a hunter green sweatshirt and navy blue sweatpants and house shoes. He opened the door and invited me inside and told me to have a seat on their white leather couch, which felt like a cross between "Miami Vice" and the "Golden Girls." The whole house did really. There were lots of knick knacks which normally I can't stand, but in this house, seemed appropriate. Sweet, even. I felt like I was at my grandmother's house. Only my Grandma wasn't a psychic. In fact, I suspected my Grandma was looking down on me from heaven extremely disappointed that I was seeking Rose's advice instead of the advice of Jesus.

I had a private conversation with my Grandma just to assure her, and myself, that this is just another experience for the blog.

Rose's husband, whose name I still don't know, sat down on a chair up against the wall and I watched their pets, a couple of cats and a fluffy chow dog mill about. We both stared at "The Price is Right" which was playing loudly on a flat screen television hanging above their fireplace. Psychic reading business must be doing just fine despite the economic downturn, I thought to myself. This was a nice TV. Rose's husband told me that he had been playing solitaire on the computer when I knocked on the door, as if he was explaining why it took him so long to answer. And then we talked about Drew Carey taking Bob Barker's hosting job on the "Price is Right" as we watched an extremely excitable woman win a new car.

He asked me questions about myself, likely just making friendly conversation, but I was convinced he was asking me these questions so he could filter information to Rose ahead of our meeting. So I kept my answers short, limiting them to one word.

Just when our interaction had reached an all-time high level of awkwardness, a guy, likely a few years older than me, blew the basement door open and stormed through. He stopped briefly to acknowledge me, and then Rose's husband. He was holding a cassette tape and a small notebook in his hands. He looked so happy, so eager, like Rose had just told him he was going to win the lottery and he was rushing out to buy a ticket. We all said goodbye to each other and in an instant, he was gone.

The front door slammed behind excited guy and Rose's husband told me it was my turn to head on downstairs. So I did.

I walked downstairs to the basement, a little freaked out about what I was going to find down there, but also amped considering I could soon be rushing out of Rose's house with great news just like the other guy. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, standing before me was a little old lady next to a round table. On the table was an old-school cassette player, a box of cassettes and two decks of cards.

She reminded me of my Grandma's best friend Ruth. She said hello and asked me to have a seat across from her at the table. Rose slipped a cassette into her player and pressed "Record." Then she said she was going to take a look at my palms, so she put out a stack of table cloths and asked me to turn my hands over.

"Are you right handed?" she asked me.

I told her I was.

She pointed at my left hand and said, "that's where you've been," and then she motioned to my right hand, "and this is where you're going."

She went on to explain that the left hand is important to see where I've been and to see if there had been any negative forces or experiences ("garbage," she called it) that I might've carried over to my present and future lives.

On my left hand she said that right after I was born there was a health problem with me or my mom, liking having to do with food. My issues with food came much later in life, and I was unaware of any health problems I might have had as a baby. I made a mental note to ask my mom about this, but I didn't think Rose was off to such a great start.

Rose: Around ages 13, 14, and 15 was an emotional time. You're emotions seemed to scatter.
Well, of course they are. Isn't it that period of every girl's life full of emotional highs and lows?

Rose: Around your later teenage years, you attached to someone. It was a strong attachment and I see some negative energy around it. And then around seven or eight years ago, you separated from that person. Not sure if it was a physical separation like a move, or just an emotional separation.
Ok, Rose, now we're talking. Yes, there was a guy, a best friend, that I attached to during that time and we were separated by distance. This is all starting to sound like my life.

Rose then told me that I am headed in a better direction. "It's like a light bulb went off and you knew you needed to change course," she said.

She said I was a strong person with a good mind who reasons well.
Not sure I reason well ALL of the time, but I do feel like I'm a strong person and I do have a good mind, I think.
Rose: You're a bit of a people pleaser. All the lines on this side of your hand indicate people who have caused you stress that you've tried to make happy in your life.
Yes, I am a people pleaser. And a pushover, too!

Rose inspected my hand like a seasoned mechanic looking at a broken down car. She was nonchalant and confident, like what she was saying she knew was the truth. I couldn't help but to believe everything she said.

Rose: You've had one surgery, so your health troubles are minor.
Tonsillectomy, age 6. Damn, she's good.

Rose: You're moving line shows me you're not from Georgia. Someone must've dragged you here kicking and screaming.
Preach it, Rose. No, I'm not from Georgia and that "someone" was a job, but close enough.

Rose: The star indicates your dad has either passed or was good for you in some respect.
My dad is thankfully still around and has been good for me in many respects. What a confusing star, though, to present two completely opposite scenarios. Good for me or Dead?

With the exception of a few blunders, Rose was pretty much on target so far. She ended looking at my left hand by telling me she sees my mom and another woman as strong female presence helping raise me. I have a great mom, and an arsenal of aunts and older cousins and at one time, Grandmothers, but my immediate family lived so far away from them, I don't know that they helped raise me necessarily. Maybe Rose is having an "off" day.

She allowed me to relax my left hand and she moved on to my right, indicating there wasn't a lot of abuse or too many negative experiences that I carried over to my life now.

Rose: You're learning. You're learning about money, like how to hold on to it.
Of course I am. Aren't we all?

She told me I was a controlled person, but not to the extreme. I only control what is affecting me. She is right.

"Look at your emotional line," she said, pointing at my hand. "You were a little basket case over the holidays, weren't you?"

At the time, sitting there in front of her, I thought, "Wow, she really knows me." I was a basket case over the holidays. And 2010 has not been my year so far. I laughed out loud, shocked that she could tell this about me just by looking at my hand.

Since then, though, I've been less impressed with this observation. The holidays are stressful and therefore an emotional time for a lot of people.

She went on to tell me that I needed to let whoever or whatever was responsible for my negative feelings during the holidays go.

Rose: You need to open the door for this new person. He connects to your line of Venus. Do you think you've met him already? I don't think so. Crap, what if I did, but didn't know it?

Rose: I'm sensing more scattering of your emotions. Like you want to feel something, but you're scared, you want to attach to someone but you don't want to get hurt.
Isn't everyone scared of that? Am I more so than others?

Rose said she sees a lot of trips in my future. Several short trips and one long one on, by or over the water. Considering the world is 70 percent water, she just about covered any possible trip scenario there is, but still, I was intrigued. I was leaving for Lake Tahoe in a few days, and my friend Maribeth and I had just discussed a trip she wants us to take for her 30th birthday in April.

Rose: You're going to have help in making the decision on where you're going. And it's going to present itself in April.
Wow. Freaky.
Rose nailed my love of travel. Even if she got everything else wrong, I was a believer.

She pushed my sleeve back and looked at the lines on my wrist.

"Oh God, you're gonna live for forever," she said, as if I was cursed. "Like into your nineties."

This news made me happy. If I'm going to live to be in my nineties, maybe I can stop freaking about turning 30. I have plenty of time (60 years) to do all of the things I want to do.

My unity line showed her that I'm destined to be in a "Till Death do you part," marriage. "You better choose your partner wisely," she warned, "because you're only getting married once, and you don't want to be stuck with the wrong person."

At the end of my hand reading, she told me she thinks I'll be entering into a business partnership probably next year.
With a book publisher, perhaps?!

She said she sees two money lines, one secure line (presumably from my job) and one extra line (from another source, which at this point is to be determined). Money, for me, won't be an issue, she explained.
Hmm...isn't money always an issue? Do we ever have enough?

Regardless, I like what Grandma Rose has to say so far.

She told me to shuffle the tarot cards and then choose 13 and hand them to her. She turned each of the 13 that I chose and laid them out on the table. And this is the part of the reading that became a big blur.

Rose reiterated that I am a strong person with good judgment, but I should guard against carelessness. I need to watch my diet and watch my temper. All great pieces of advice, but none of what she said felt like it was specifically for me.

She turned over a card with a scary creature on it.

"An enemy," she said. I raised my eyebrows, startled.

She turned another card over.

"The end of an enemy." I exhaled.

She turned over a card with a scene by the ocean.

"That's your trip," she said. "And it says, 'hope by the water.'"

She went on to say that the guy that is going to come into my life has something to do with my trip by the water. Or, she said, maybe he's a water sign? He has something to do with water. Tahoe, perhaps? The not-yet-planned trip by the water with Maribeth? Is a sailor? A plumber? He drinks water? He showers? Rose, you're killing me!

On one of the later cards, she said a man will cause me trouble. Was the water guy going to cause me stress? If so, I want him to stay away.

She gave me another deck of cards, asked me to shuffle and then divide them into three separate piles and make a wish.

I did and she pointed to the numbers on top of the cards indicating that my lucky numbers are 4, 6, and 9. The number "4" has always been my lucky number, so I was into this.

Rose said there is a family quarrel that I should look out for in the coming months. She told me to stay out of it.

"You’re going to want to try and fix things because you're a fixer," she said. "Don't. Just let it work itself out."

My family doesn't really fight much, so I was intrigued, and scared, by this.

She also said I need to be more vocal about what I want, and in relationships, to be as mindful about my needs as I am about the other person's needs.

"I hesitate to tell you to be more demanding, but speak up about what you want and what you need," she said.

At the end, she asked me if I had any questions and I laughed out loud.

"Uh...yeah, I have a lot of questions."

We went back and forth and she gave me more insight about some of the things she saw in the cards and on my hand.

This is a year of power for me, so the wish I made will come true and anything that I want to have happen should be easy for me.
Great! If only I knew specifically what I wanted.
As for the mystery person by the water, there will be a sense of familiarity around him. I asked her if I already knew him and she said she wasn’t sure, but I will have a sense of knowing him. She’s not sure if he’s been married before, but he’s very good-looking and he’s a catch.
Of course he's good-looking, Rose! The men in my dreams are always good-looking.

So what about a man causing me trouble? Is it the guy on the water? She said water boy isn’t going to cause me stress. But there is an arrogance surrounding him, because he is so good-looking. The arrogance might cause me stress. So water boy is arrogant? Damn.

The skeptic in me had to wonder, “Does Rose ever give anyone any bad news?” So far, I was loving this experience, but I wondered how I would feel about it if she’d told me “You’re going to marry multiple times, and some of your husbands are going to be poor and unattractive and possibly abusive. Your career is questionable and money problems will plague you forever.”

So I asked her, "Do you always give people good news?”

She assured me she didn’t and that she has to deliver death, divorce and bad health news often, usually to ears that don’t want to hear it, or believe what she telling her.
Well, duh, Rose. Who ever wants to hear about any of that stuff?

While writing this entry, I revisited the emails Natalie and I exchanged and re-read what she told me about her meeting with Rose. Turns out, Natalie is also a people pleaser, who was raised by two strong females, and that she is destined to meet Mr. Right, who is attractive and educated. She could be planning a wedding by the end of the year, according to Grandma Rose.

Damn, either Natalie and I are destined to live the same life, or Rose sees two 29-year old lively women, both somewhat uncertain and concerned with how life is all going to shake out and sees more or less similar outcomes. Don't get me wrong, Natalie is awesome and she and I are a lot alike in many ways. So, if my life and hers are headed on the same track, that's just fine with me. I guess I was hoping that all of this good news Rose was telling me about my life wasn't so generic.

But then again, I suppose it makes sense. Of course Natalie and I are going to be successful at money matters and matters of the heart. We're intelligent, attractive, fun, sweet girls. Our lives are going to work out. Not because Rose read it on our hands or saw it on some cards. But because it will. It has to!

Before I left, Rose handed me the cassette tape of our meeting. I said goodbye to her and her husband in sweatpants and headed back to Atlanta.

I called every single member of my family on the way home, with the exception of my sister-in-law Katie because she's only been in our family officially for a few months and I thought if I bombarded her with this insanity she might start looking for a way out.

My parents laughed. My dad laughed a lot. Both were interested in what Rose had to tell me, but I think they were relieved that I wasn't taking it too seriously.

My brother Jeff was intrigued. He was also fixated on the "family quarrel."

"What? Like a fight within our family?"


"Like our immediate family? Or our relatives? What's the fight about?"

I don't know. Can we get back to me and this guy by the water?

Jeff listened to all of the details about the reading and he said, encouragingly, but also in a you-wasted-your-money-going-to-see-this-lady tone of voice, "Well, of course all of that stuff is going to happen to you. Because you have a lot going for you. And you want it to."

My brother believes, wholeheartedly, in the message behind the book, The Secret. If you visualize success and believe that it will come to you, then it will. Maybe not as quickly as you would like, but keep seeing it, keep imagining it, and whatever you want will be yours.

My own belief that everything in my life is going to work out just the way that I want it to changes with the weather. So hearing someone else, even a senior citizen psychic, tell me that it will felt good. If that's crazy, or ridiculous, then maybe I am.

I'm not sure I buy all the specifics of what Rose had to say, but according to her, I'm right on track for success, even if Mr. Right doesn't have anything to do with water or I never write a book that gets published.

I'm going to keep lingering by the water cooler at work, though. Just in case.

***Psychic Rose has requested her information not be shared, so I'm sorry I cannot provide it. Even if you beg.***